Lance

[Deleted]

This is the first part of the first draft for the script of that VN I've been talking about for the past few million years or so. The text is formatted to fit into/look like text boxes. Some of you who have good memories and who have been around for a few years may recognise the premise being extremely similar to one I had written about a few years back, which can be found a few pages back on the talent board. Don't read it it sucks. But basically feedback would be appreciated. I'll update this thread with more text if there seems to be some interest, otherwise I'll keep writing and improving it in my own time.


I was 8 years old when it happened.

I was with my parents, swimming in a lake a short drive from our house. It was just the three of us there, and it was a bright, warm day in late August. I was due back at school the following month, just a short few weeks away, so I knew it may have been one of our last days out together for a year.

When Lance landed that afternoon, at first I wasn’t quite sure what had happened. I saw something massive flash in the distance, and I heard a loud, deafening boom that lasted only a few seconds. While my parents looked terrified, I figured it had nothing to do with me, and I returned to playing in the water.

Then the sky went dark.

I remember that sudden feeling, a deep chill like the water itself had clasped my body tightly. The water felt so cold on my fragile young body that within seconds, I had sunk beneath the surface of the water like a rock, unable to move.

My parents quickly dragged me out of the water just as I passed out, wrapping me in a towel and carrying me back to the car immediately. I still admire my father for being able to drive us home in complete darkness, using only the slight few metres given to us by our weak headlights for direction.

The arrival of Lance will always be a day forever remembered as the day Earth was placed on a ticking clock, the day humanity was given the impossible challenge of surviving in a world without sunlight.

But I’ll always remember it as the day I almost drowned in shallow water, that chilling sensation forever recalled in my nightmares. A perfect afternoon, ruined. Most of all, I’ll always consider it the day that my childhood came to an abrupt end.


The obnoxious jingle of my phone alarm sounded, immediately prompting me to shut it off. Ignoring my dream, I got out of bed and yawned, turning on the dim lights and walking to the kitchen to make myself breakfast. I opened my curtains to look outside as I waited.

As usual, it was almost impossible to see anything outside the window save for the many small dots of human light that illuminated London, and behind that, Lance, which towered above the rest of the world, reaching far up into the sky, the top obscured by the darkness.

It, too, was decorated in lights, rings which distinctly outlined the cylindrical shape of the structure, making it the most distinct object in the city, despite how far away it was in actuality- resting in the English Channel.

It had landed on Earth in the year 2020, no one knows where it came from, how it arrived on Earth without any prior warning from telescopes, or how it landed at the speed it did without causing catastrophic damage to the surface of the Earth.

All I or anyone else knows is that upon landing, Lance was somehow able to separate Earth from the rest of space- the sun’s rays no longer reach Earth, and neither the stars nor the Moon are visible.

Contact has been lost with all satellites, telescopes, and space stations already orbiting Earth, and all attempts to send more things into space have been met with failure- all contact is lost with anything that goes past a certain point in the sky, and they never return.

For all intents and purposes, we have been imprisoned on a cold, sunless Earth by Lance- and ironically, the geothermal energy produced by Lance is all that keeps humanity alive, even as most other parts of the Earth have begun to freeze over.

I grimaced at the object as I buttered my toast, unable to look away as my mind drifted to the thought of having to visit Lance for the first time in my life- potentially everyday for the rest of my life. I am going to become a security guard at Lance, starting today.

After eating, I dressed myself simple black jeans and a thin shirt, and over that a large, thick coat that was long enough to reach my knees. It also had a fluffy hood and a scarf which covered my mouth.

The coat was in a similar style to what most people wore these days to stave off the cold, though mine was white, and it had a distinctive glowing yellow logo on my left breast which showed that I was official Lance staff.

As I stepped into my large boots and headed outside, I was grateful to the Lance authorities for having given me the coat in advance, since I’d lost my previous coat when I moved to London.

I reached my train at 7am, feeling glad that I hadn’t missed it on my first day. It was crowded and even hot in the underground, which prompted me to unzip my coat while I was in the train. All the seats had been taken, so I stood up for a few minutes while I waited for the train to move.

A young man on his phone looked up at me for a brief moment, and noticed the Lance logo on my jacket.

Man
I’m so sorry sir, please, take my seat.

He stood up and pointed to the spot where he had been sitting.

Lawrence
There’s really no need for that-

Man
No no, I insist, please.

I don’t want to make a scene...

Lawrence
Um, thank you.

I sat down. Did people really respect Lance staff that much?

The train took off. I was bored on the train, and unfortunately, there was nothing to look at. The train ran underground using the old channel tunnel which had been destroyed by Lance, but thankfully, it had only taken a few years to repurpose the tunnel as a way to reach Lance easily from underground.

I had been told to not take a phone with me for security reasons, and I was apparently going to be given an internal communicator anyway. So while I waited to arrive, I simply sat on the cramped train, alone with my thoughts.

[Stove]

You're a little too blunt when it comes to writing the details. Show, don't tell.
It's a little rough around the edges, but still an enjoyable read. Looking forward to the next part, if you decide to post it.

[Ultima Atulos Maxim]

Throughly enjoyed this.

Don't worry about explaining too much, otherwise you'll not have the chance to write everything you want. Besides, as this is a draft, it's good to write as much as possible, so you have more topics to refine a story from.

Looking forward to seeing more.

[Deleted]

Thanks a lot for the feedback, glad you enjoyed it.

Yeah, I'm writing what I can and not worrying too much about the descriptions because I hope that the actual text will eventually have some kind of art to go with it. And as Ultima said, first drafts can get as many ideas down on the page as possible in preparation for when the text is eventually cut down. I do feel like the exposition here isn't particularly graceful- I've written out those words tons of time in planning though, so I'd rather focus on trying to get to the other characters.

[Deleted]

Due to interest I'm going to keep putting up more in this thread. I hope to be relatively consistent. I want to write every day to keep myself from becoming complacent, so hopefully expect more posts every two or three days. I'll try to keep posts lengthy enough that I'm not just posting in this thread rapid-fire.

One other thing, this will have dialogue options. There's only one major choice that comes to mind right now, but we'll come to that if and when we cross it. In the meantime, tell me if you want to see every possible outcome of a dialogue option (which will mostly be a few different lines in the same scene with longer term triggers) or if you only want to see one choice of my choosing. I could leave it up to a vote, but honestly I think that would slow me down too much and it wouldn't really be all that helpful to me.

[Ayano☆ＵＬＴＲＡ]

You did a great job with this as you have me asking questions and leaving me with intrigue. I'm looking forward to reading the next part :D

[Deleted]

More words! Since no one said anything about this I just decided to show both dialogue options.

The train stopped, but only a few people exited the train. The tunnel continued, ending at Paris, and it appeared that that’s where most of the passengers were headed. The train left the station soon after I stepped off.

As I looked around, it took me a moment to realise that I had already step foot inside Lance for the very first time. I was in a large cavernous space, all the walls and the roof of the space was a rusted metal, covered in many green lights.

From my understanding, the space inside Lance had been here since its arrival. But as I looked around I saw evidence showing how the people working here had altered Lance to adapt. A crude hole had been cut in the wall to connect Lance to the channel tunnel, and it was clear that the tunnel and Lance were of a completely different architecture.

The gates leading to the interior had been bolted to the ground, and a lot of empty space had been left to the sides of the station. Various food vendors had taken the space for themselves, just outside the gates, where they sold to Lance staff and those waiting for their train.

I approached the gate, labeled staff arrival, and showed my identification to a man sitting in a glass box, who was wearing the same coat as me.

Guard
Hello there Mr Lawrence… Lance?
Lawrence
I know what you’re thinking. Please don’t say anything more about it, so please call me Lawrence.

I remember how I used to be proud of my surname, as it was rare and regal sounding, and it sounded good with my forename. But in January of 2021, this monstrosity of a tower just had to also be named Lance officially by the government, as if Lance and Earth’s people itself were playing a practical joke on me. I wished to be rid of the association.

The guard coughed awkwardly.

Guard
Well then, Mr Lawrence, welcome to Lance. My name is Ted Burns, but everyone just calls me Smithers.

I smiled lightly at the man’s casual nature and way of speaking, even though it was our first meeting. I had come here feeling worried that the staff would be too self-serious considering their jobs. Unfortunately, I was still too on edge to give him a proper response.

Lawrence
… They do?

Ted
I’m just joking! Sorry, you must nervous about your first day. Call me Ted. My I was told to take you to meet the security chief.

Ted left the box and led me through the gate. There was a large empty space between the gates and a series of stairs that branched off in different directions through different hallways.

Ted
The central stairway leads upward, which will take you to the labs where they study Lawrence- I mean Lance.

I glared at him for his joke despite having asked him to not make a big deal out of it. He flashed me a toothy grin in response, urging me to loosen up. I was still trying to take in the sheer scale of Lance.

Ted
To the left, you’ll take stairs down to the power plant, where they collect and distribute geothermal energy produced by Lance. The right is where we’re headed right now. We have a convenient method for memorising the layout- green lights are for the station, blue lights are for the labs, red lights are for the power plants, and the yellow lights are for security.

We eventually reached the yellow stairs on the right, and we began walking up them.

Ted
So Lawrence, what made you want to come to Lance?

Lawrence
Well… I used to live in Manchester, but when Lance hit, our family was forced to move south, closer to Lance, due to the cold. We couldn’t really afford a good place, however, and I couldn’t do anything to help since I was young.

Lawrence
We didn’t stay in one place for very long, so I took a lot of odd jobs during my teens to help support the family in place of school. Eventually, when I turned 21 this year, it was decided that I should move to London. While looking for jobs I found this one. It was the best paying job so… I decided to take it.

Ted
Sounds pretty rough. To tell you the truth, I’m a former astronaut.

Lawrence
That’s… wow, I’ve never heard of something so unlucky.

Ted
Tell me about it. A lot of my training became useless, but I think I’m still useful here. In fact, I live here.

Lawrence
You can do that?

Ted
Lance is huge! So yeah, I do. And don’t worry, I still know my science, so I help out at the lab a lot as well. I think you’ll like everyone up there when you get to meet them. I just… feel like I’m making a difference here. For humanity, you know?

Lawrence
1) Yeah, I know what you mean
2) I’d rather not be in a place like this.

If 1: Yeah, I know what you mean. The people up at the labs must be working hard to try and get the sunlight back… without it, we’re basically doomed.

Ted
Exactly! Some people think it’s impossible, but I know we’ll be able to get back to space someday.

End Branch

If 2: I’d rather not be in a place like this. Lance has made our lives a living hell, so at this point I can only really be thankful for the energy in generates. At least we have that much.

Ted looked deflated.

Ted
Yeah… well, I suppose I can understand that sentiment.

End Branch

[Ultima Atulos Maxim]

Well done with the dialogue options.

[Deleted]

At the top of the stairs were a row of metal doors, illuminated in a hallway of yellow lights.

Ted
These are the offices for the security staff. First on the left there is the break room, which contains a cafeteria. The food there is pretty good if that’s your thing. On the right is a storage cupboard, and second on the right is the accounting office.

Ted
For the time being you won’t need to worry about the other offices on this floor. Let's go up the next flight of stairs to the top floor of security.

Next to where we had come up, there was another flight of stairs leading upwards. Despite Ted had said, on the next floor there was yet another flight of stairs.

Ted
If you go up again, you’ll reach the living accommodations for security staff, where I live. On the left here is the conference room, which I doubt you’ll be using. At the end of the hall here is the office of the chief of security, Smith.

Ted knocked on Smith’s door. We waited a few moments before we heard a voice call out.

Smith
Enter!

Ted opened the door, and held it open so that I could go in first.

Smith
So you’re the new employee? Lance, was it? Said Smith the moment I entered.

Lawrence
Uh, yes, sir.

I stammered a response, looking around his office. It was largely barren, covered in metallic pipes and rusted walls. Come to think of it, a lot of Lance was permeated with the stench of sea salt, and in this compact space, it was even more apparent.

Smith only had a wooden desk and a wooden bookshelf which looked completely out of place with the rest of the room. I realised I was going to be seeing a lot of out of place furniture in Lance.

Smith was silent for a few more moments, not even acknowledging the presence of Ted, while he looked through the paperwork on his desk. He eventually put down his papers and looked up at me from behind his glasses.

Smith
Lance’s security systems, despite being government funded, is significantly less advanced than what you may expect. Much of Lance’s infostructure is something we have to build around, and we have thus far explored barely a fraction of its interior.

Smith
This means we have no cameras, no scanners, no corridors riddled with lasers. You are all we have, and all you have are these.

Smith reached under the table and unceremoniously dumped a pile of equipment on his desk. I saw a bullet proof vest, an ID card with my name on it, and what appeared to be a gun, though I didn’t recognise its make.

Smith
You will be given these at the gate when you enter, and when you leave, you will hand them back. To change into the vest, you will have to go to the locker room next to the red stairs whenever you enter. The key card merely serves as identification, please where it round your neck.

He handed me the card as he said this. It was attached to a short strap, so I did what I was told and I put it around my neck.

Smith
Lastly, this is the taser. There is a holster inside your coat which houses it. It is only to be used in emergencies. The taser will fire two electrodes that will attach to the target, and proceed to shock them. Right now it is on safety mode, so don’t worry about accidentally firing it.

Smith
You will be required to practice with the taser. Ted will take you down to the firing range nearby the changing rooms soon. You will be required to practice in the firing range for one hour a week by law. I’ve never had to use this in a real situation, let’s hope you never have to either.

Smith
As part of your job you will be working the guard station next to the train station, and for the first month, we will have you stationed for most of your time in both the power plant and the labs. After the first month, you will be required to choose where you want to be stationed on a more permanent basis.

Lawrence
… Why? Um, sir?

Smith
Your duty as security will have you working a nine hour shift each day, not including your commute. You will be free on Sundays, but you must be available to come to Lance at a moment's notice, and occasionally work unpaid overtime. This means you will be spending a lot of time at work.

Smith
This decision was implemented as a favour to the security staff, as most dislike having to travel between the two areas as they are needed, on top of having shifts at the booth. Lance is large, so it is impractical to have you wondering between divisions.

Smith
Naturally, you will also be heavily interacting with the staff who work in these divisions. Many of the lab and power plant staff work longer hours than you do, and many of them also live at Lance. So part of the security staff’s job is to help maintain their wellbeing. You must think of yourself as their security, not Lance’s security.

Smith
Since these interactions are so important, you can expect your decision to be largely impacted by the staff you get along with most easily, and the working conditions you find to be most comfortable.

Smith
Do you have any questions?

[Ayano☆ＵＬＴＲＡ]

How come Lawrence wasn't informed on how unreasonable his hours are before hand? Or was he already?

I like how Smith is written, he feels pretty believable to me. Good stuff!

[Deleted]

It's more that he was reminded as a response to Lawrence's question.

[Deleted]

(I don't proof read these since I write these late at night before going to bed. I just want to get stuff out quickly right now. I notice silly mistakes as I write sometimes, so please let me know what I can fix grammatically. I know Zteve is excellent at that. Thanks.)

Lawrence
Not right now, sir.

Smith
Very well. Burns, please show him the labs and the power plant before lunch. You may then take Lawrence to the firing range. Your shift shall end early today Lawrence, but tomorrow will be your first full day. Report to me here first thing tomorrow morning. Best of luck.

Lawrence
Thank you, sir.

Ted
Yes sir.

Ted led me out of the room and back down to the large central room.

Ted
I’ll take you to the power plant first. You’ll probably need to wash your hands and face in the lab afterwards.

Lawrence
Huh. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised that it’s kinda dirty down there.

Ted
It’s not there to be presentable, that’s for sure! It’s largely the soot that you have to deal with. It gets kind of warm down there too, so you may get sweaty. You’ll probably want to unzip your coat.

Ted led me down the stairs, and I immediately felt the unfamiliar pressure of heat wash over me. It was pleasant, nostalgic in a way, but I immediately felt the urge to throw off my coat entirely. I unzipped it carefully as Ted had suggested.

The power plant was poorly lit, and the red lights gave it a dangerous, claustrophobic feeling. As we reached the bottom of the stairs, I could already feel the heat and soot in the air restricting my breathing slightly.

The bottom of the stairs opened up onto a large metallic walkway. Above and beneath us were large wells in which I could see lava slowly swirling around. There were hundreds of pipes connecting the various basins, all pointing upwards towards the surface.

Lawrence
So this is what keeps me warm at night…

Ted
It’s amazing, isn’t it? Lance’s powerplant was all here and operational before we reached it. It’s almost like it was designed to extract molten energy from planets. We had to turn it on of course, and takes a lot to run.

Ted
But otherwise, it’s been digging up a ton of geothermal energy and lava direct from the Earth’s core. We wouldn’t have been able to survive this long without the power plant.

Lawrence
God takes away, and God gives. We wouldn’t need this if Lance hadn’t arrived to begin with.

Ted
Very true. With no solar energy, no major winds, and with most of the oceans and lakes freezing up, Lance and nuclear energy is about all we have left. Anyway.

Ted showed me across the walkway, pointing out the various landmarks.
Ted
The power plant has a very organised structure to it. The layout is mostly the same no matter how high up or low you go. Most of the power plant is on the lower floor however, since as you can see, walkways don’t cover the entire area up there.

Ted
It’ll be your job to walk around and keep an eye on things. The workers are highly capable and well trained, but accidents happen, and more importantly, they have a tendency to get into fights. There are two separate living wards for the workers further below, and a significant amount of them live here.

Ted
So as a result, they split themselves into groups, they’ll fight over food and, well… pride, I suppose. Generally we don’t mind what they get up to in the wards, and we have security staff positioned here, but if it spills over to their work in the upper levels, you’ll have to step in.

A lot of the workers looked incredibly strong and intimidating. While my inflated my fragile figure, I still felt very small even looking at them from a distance.

Lawrence
Well… I hope they’re not violent towards security staff.

Ted
Haha! I wouldn’t worry too much. Some of them are scary, but they’re dealt with. I’m sure you’ll get along with the ones you’ll have to talk to. They’re just principled is all. I’ve only ever had to step in once, I forget what it was about. I don’t really pay attention.

Ted took me to the bottom floor of the power plant, and showed me where the living wards were for the workers. They were on opposite sides of the large plant. Seeing inside, I noticed that they had exercise grounds, shops, and a small restaurant as well as living quarters.

Ted
I won’t show you inside. They appreciate their privacy, and we have guards specifically designed to watch over the wards. You won’t have to worry about it for the time being, but if you decide to work here longer term, you’ll probably need to watch the wards at some point.

Ted
That’s about it here. I’m getting kind of stuffy, so should we head up?

Lawrence
Sure-

Just as we were about to head up, I saw a group of workers nearby pushing a cart filled with coal. There was a girl standing nearby with a clipboard, looking out of place with the rest of the workers. She looked young, like she was still a teenager, or in her early 20s.
She wore a black shirt and workers trousers, but she had a fragile, pale frame which suggested she didn’t work at the plant. She had long, blonde hair carefully groomed and fashioned with a red headband.

Girl
Very good we’re almost there. The next cart will be the last, so if we could up the pace that would be simply grand. I have work to attend to.

She saw me looking at her, and walked over to the two of us.

Girl
I haven’t seen you before, so I assume you must be the new security staff. Greetings, my name is Ashley Parker. I am the daughter of Graham Parker who runs the power plant. As he is away on business -more or less permanently- I keep things organised here in his stead.

Ashley
Yes I am young for my position, I am 20. Yes, I live at Lance in my own private room, no, I don’t help with the manual labour, I’m clearly not built with that. No, that does not put me at odds with the workers anymore, I am swamped with tons of paper work every day to compensate. Your name is?

Stunned at her forward introduction, I barely stammered out my name in time before she began speaking again.

Lawrence
U-Um, Lawrence?

I said, extending my hand.

Ashley
Welcome to Lance Lawrence.

She shook my hand in a single, firm motion before quickly letting go. I noticed that she seemed to be the type who frequently bit her fingernails. Much like I was.

Ashley
I look forward to a strong working relationship. Of course, that’ll only be before you decide to go up and work at the labs, which is the sensible, most frequent choice. Oh. And Hi Ted. How are you?

Ted remained silent. Clearly used to, and tired of, Ashley’s strange manner of social interaction. It was also possible he had entirely tuned out of the conversation.

Ashley
Oh hi Ashley. How are you? Thanks, never been better. Glad you’re doing well Ted. Best of luck you in your new position Lawrence. Well, as riveting as this has been, I am very busy. Excuse me.

Ashley turned on her heels and returned to the workers, who had left to pick up the other cart.

Ted
… Well, that’s Ashley. She’s a good kid. Really.

Lawrence
Well, she wasn’t impolite…

We both silently turned and began heading up the stairs, heading towards the labs next.

[Ayano☆ＵＬＴＲＡ]

I'm kinda sad I'm reading it in such short bursts as I just about start to feel immersed and then it's over t.t But anway, good work as usual Al, I'm looking forward to the next part. : )

[Deleted]

Thanks! Sorry if the posts feel short. I want to post whatever I write after a major writing session so that I'm not sitting on a pile of unread content. I'm also aware that not all of us here (such as Phiotan) necessarily enjoy reading huge piles of text all at once, so I hope the current length is enough to allow everyone here to quickly keep up to date with the story without it feeling like they have to dedicate a lot of time in one sitting.

[Deleted]

I immediately felt a chill as we returned to the central room, quickly zipping up my coat. I noticed Ted had also buried his hands in his pockets.

Ted
It’s a real shock to your senses, right? Kicks you right back into reality. And it’s not even that cold inside Lance. At least compared to outside.

Lawrence
I sure hope the labs are warmer…

Ted
No dice I’m afraid. It’s actually kept colder up there, largely for the sake of the chemistry labs.

Lawrence
What good is chemistry for getting us back to space?

Ted
There’s more things to worry about than that. It is their primary concern of course, but Lance’s labs have become the top research centre in the world in the past few years. Everything imaginable is funded up there.

Ted
Like for example, both the biology and chemistry labs research Vitamin D supplements, or alternate ways for humans to get around needing sunlight in general.

Lawrence
Yeah, hear rickets have been a huge problem lately, it’s pretty scary.

We finished walking up the stairs, and as Ted had warned, I found it so cold that it took my breath away. I felt a pain from the cold on my face, my nose in particular, and snot began to unflatteringly dribble from my nose.

Ted
You should take one of these.

Ted handed me a handkerchief, silently rubbing his nose to give me a hint.

Lawrence
Thanks.

I hid my hands underneath my armpits, despite them being gloved, and followed Ted as he gave me a tour.

Ted
So this room on the left leads to the GM agriculture room. It’s where they study how to grow crops and meat in a sunless environment.

Lawrence
We’ve been doing that for a while already, right? Before Lance even.

Ted
There’s always room for improvement. A lot of the meat they grow nowadays is still rather tasteless. I’d show you inside, but like a lot of the labs on this floor, you’ll generally need to be showered and inspected. They don’t want you to carry germs and god knows what else in and out.

Ted
Down the stairs there you’ll find the biology labs, where they study the human body, like I was telling you earlier. Again, you won’t be heading down there much. Upstairs is where you’ll be spending most of your time.

Ted led me upstairs. It was a short walk before we ended up in a large room, although it wasn’t nearly as large as the ground floor or the power plant.

Central to the room was a large group of computers with scientists operating them, looking bored out of their minds. Their screens were pitch black.

Ted
Here is where they operate the drone telescopes, stationed just at the point of no return in the sky, as it were. They’ve been operating these things intently studying every inch of the sky for years now.

Lawrence
I feel sorry for them… it seems so hopeless.

Ted
Well, you can’t give up now, right? In any case, you’ll have to guard this room a fair bit, but don’t distract anyone at the computers unless they leave them for a break. I encourage you to talk to them on break, however. Not many people up here get to see other people all that much.

Ted pointed at a door off to the side of the room.

Ted
The scientist’s living quarters is upstairs. Unlike the power plant, they don’t have any food up here, so it’ll often be your job to carry up food from the ground floor so they can eat while working. Most people on this floor are pretty much shut-ins who never go downstairs.

Lawrence
Those hours seem incredibly slavish.

Ted
A lot of the people up here live and breathe their work. It’s an honour for them to have the opportunity to do this. They build up a ton of vacation time that they don’t used until they’re legally forced too, at which point they’ll take more than a month off to spend time with their family.

Ted pointed to another door, and led me through it.

Ted
And here is-

Scientist
Oh hey Ted, I was starting to think you wouldn’t visit today! Oh, who’s this guy?

The moment we came in through the door, a woman in a lab coat greeted us. She looked to be in her mid 20s, with short brown hair and thick rimmed glasses. She was wearing a lab coat, unlike a lot of the other scientists on this floor who had bundled themselves in thick coats.

Lawrence
Hi, uh, I’m Lawrence. Nice to meet you.

Chloe
My name is Chloe Ellis. So… are you new staff?

While she had greeted Ted with enthusiasm, I noticed her tone of voice and body language shrink as she introduced herself. Was she shy? Or maybe my nose had started dribbling again. My voice had sounded stuffy too. I refrained from scratching it, trying not to draw attention to my sudden cold.

Ted
That’s right. I’m showing Mr Lance here around the labs right now.

Chloe
M-Mr Lance? Please forgive my rudeness, do you own-

I waved my hands in front of me as I caught her misunderstanding.

Lawrence
It’s just an unfortunate surname! I’m here as security staff. So, uh, what do you do here?

Chloe
Oh, I’m sorry... well, I’m a theoretical physicist. But right now my efforts have been focused on studying Lance itself. Did you know we haven’t even explored 20% of Lance’s total interior?

There was a short pause, as I wasn’t sure how to respond.

Ted
Show Lawrence what you’ve been working on, Chloe.

Chloe nodded, walking to the other side of the room and beckoning me over. While the lab Choe worked in was somewhat small compared to the other one, there was a window at the back of it that showed a small, mostly empty room. The main draw of this room was a large door inside, that looked completely different to the other doors inside Lance.

Chloe
I spend most of my time working in these two rooms. There’s a door just over here- let me just input the passcode.

Chloe went into the corner and typed a number into the keypad, opening up another door next to the windows. The room with the large door in it was even colder than the other rooms in the labs, it was striking me just how insane it was that Chloe was dressed rather lightly for these conditions.

Chloe
This door has so far proved impossible to open. It’s made of a metal that we haven’t been able to identify. While the rest of the materials comprising Lance can be easily identified, this door is, well, simply alien.

Lawrence
So it’s an extremely durable material? Like diamond?

Chloe
Not… quite.

Chloe took a pen out from her pocket, and pointed it towards the door. A hot laser shot out of it, melting the metal on the door. She kept it trained on the door for a few seconds, until the metal quickly began to grow back.

Chloe stopped the laser, and the metal was left wiggling in place, almost like it was alive. Strings of fibre began reattaching themselves, patching up the hole until it looked as good as new.

Chloe
It’s… simply unbelievable. It grows back no matter what we do to it. But the metal is not what we have been trying to solve. What I’ve been trying to solve. I’ve written it off as a lost cause.

Chloe pointed me towards a computer that she had connected to the door.

Chloe
To put it simply… the door itself is a puzzle, and it contains an encryption, that I’ve been able to access via this computer. Only the door doesn’t use standard binary language, so I’ve only recently managed to make sense of its code by altering my computer recently.

Chloe
And the rest of my time has been spent trying to find the various pieces of it’s encryption… sometimes that means moving my computer around physically, and using this pen to find new places to plug it in to find new pieces of code.

Lawrence
That doesn’t sound particularly intuitive.

Chloe
It’s insane. And after this, there’s another door just like this one down in the mines. But when we crack these… I think we’ll finally be able to explore the rest of Lance. And there’s going to be answers in there. I know it.

Ted patted Chloe on the head.

Ted
And this is why I visit you everyday. You’re so determined! It always keeps me optimistic. But you’ve got to take more breaks, you know? Maybe you should try taking her on a date, Lawrence.

Lawrence
But-

Chloe
We’ve only just met! Jeez Ted…

Chloe went slightly red and turned away.

Ted
Oh boy, I’m going to enjoy teasing you two if you make it so easy. Anyway, Lawrence is going to be visiting you for at least the next month anyway. I’m also going to be spending most of my time guarding the train station until the end of next week.

Ted
So I’ve asked Smith if Lawrence could take the lion's share of the shifts up here for the duration of next week. Then you’ll be working in the power plant for the week after that, and so on until the end of the month. So you’ll have plenty of time to get to know each other.

Chloe
… I see. I hope we’ll get along, Lawrence.

Lawrence
I’m sure we will.

Ted
Aw. Anyway, better take you to lunch now Lawrence. We’ve still got a long day ahead of us.

[Deleted]

Ted led me down to the cafeteria. Regular lamps had been manually fitted overhead to make the lighting of the room seem more natural and appealing compared to the stark colours I had seen in the rest of Lance.

Ted
The food here is taken fresh from the labs. It’s better than it sounds, trust me!

Lawrence
Well, everything we eat is grown somewhere or another. I’m usually too poor to buy even artificial meat these days, though.

Ted
Fear no more! Meat will be a privilege to you here. We can only serve you water, however. Maybe we should go down the pub for some proper alcohol.

Lawrence
Sure

I didn’t really drink, but I saw no reason to refuse Ted’s offer. May as well try new things in a new place.

We lined up with trays, and Ted got himself plain chicken breasts and mashed potato with peas. I got a sausage and mashed potato with peas we sat down at an empty table and began eating. I had to admit, the food was ok.

Ted
So?

Lawrence
So what?

Ted
You know, what did you think of the labs?

I stifled a laugh.

Lawrence
By that you mean, what do I think of Chloe, right?

Ted
Boo, you’re not supposed to cut straight to the point like that. You’re supposed to get all flustered…

Lawrence
She seems nice
Not sure

If 1: Yeah, she seems nice.

Ted
I know, right! You’re going to like her even more as you work with her next week. Trust me.

Branch end

If 2: I’m not really sure. I mean, I just met her. Why do you care about my opinion of her so much?

Ted
Oh well, you know…

Branch End

Ted
She mentioned I’m the only person who visits her with any frequency, right? I mean it’s not always my shift, I work full time at the labs but sometimes I’ll be at the station, or I’ll be watching other parts of the lab.

Ted
The other security officers who go up to guard her when I’m not around don’t really talk to her. They just see her as work, or they think she’s weird and too shy. But she’s a nice girl. She never really leaves that room, so I’m always having to bring her food…

Lawrence
Sounds like you’re the one who's attracted to her.
Ted
Oh! No no no. You misunderstand me. I’m married.

Lawrence
I don’t see a ring…

Ted’s cheerful demeanor dropped as he shrunk into his seat. He looked down at his hands, biting his lip.

Ted
When Lance hit… my Dad told me to take it off. I had kept it on for months, and honestly, I regret removing it…

Lawrence
Did, um, did something happen to her?

Ted
Lisa was in space when Lance hit… I was supposed to go up with her, but I was suffering from a broken arm at the time… I should have gone anyway, I should have begged…

I had no idea what to say in situations like this. I had never been the consoling type, and I already felt guilty over having led Ted down this line of conversation. I looked down and continued eating my food in silence, hoping my sympathetic expression would do the talking.

Ted
Sorry that… that wasn’t something I should have burdened you with. I mean, point is, my heart still belongs to her.

Lawrence
No, uh, sorry. I’m um… really sorry for your loss. I shouldn’t have changed the topic of conversation.

Ted weakly smiled, trying to return his usual cheerful tone to his voice. I wondered if that was for my benefit or his.

Ted
So point is, I really hope you get along with Chloe. So few people here give her the time of day, and I really would like her to be happy. I guess you could say I think of her like a daughter.

Lawrence
If you want to be creepy about it, then yeah.

Ted smiled, but I continued.

Lawrene
I’ll be sure to talk to her next week and all, but what if I’d rather go work in the power plant next month?

Ted
Hmm. Not sure why you would. It’s hot and dirty down there and the people aren’t too friendly. I mean, you wouldn’t get to see me nearly as often!

Ted
It’s also important to mention that Graham Parker, the guy who runs the power plant, isn’t around, like, ever. So you’ll get bossed around by his strange daughter all the time.

Lawrence
You mean that Ashley girl?

Ted
Yeah. I mean don’t get me wrong, she’s very capable for her age. Practically taken over her father already. He’s a government official, but he’s always away on business in Europe- trying to sell power to all the countries.

Lawrence
I would have thought the other countries would be begging for Lance’s power supply.

Ted
True, but you have to bear in mind that Lance is owned entirely by the British and French governments. The UN has essentially no say over how Lance is run at this point- soon as it landed, Britain seized the opportunity and occupied it almost immediately.

Ted
It’s a massive political struggle as it is between France and Britain. But the other countries? If they decide to rely on Lance, they’ll essentially be reliant on different governments. Spain recently signed an agreement to take power from Lance.

Ted
It might be called Spain now and for years to come, but how likely do you think that’s going to remain now that their own government answers completely to us? Maybe it won’t be long until it’s renamed ‘New England.’ And that’s assuming we eventually beat out France.

Lawrence
That sounds a little far fetched, but I see where you’re coming from. I guess that’s why Parker is away so much… he must be conducting business and political meetings constantly.

Ted
Yeah. He runs himself ragged from what I hear. I’ve met him once- he has these dead, tired eyes. Point is, Ashley isn’t the patient type. She runs herself ragged, and she runs her workforce even harder, including the security staff.

Lawrence
Like father like daughter, I suppose.

Ted
Very true! But you can see how she acts. It’s like human interaction disgusts her, so she looks down on everyone. I’ve never met someone who gets under my skin the same way she does.

Lawrence
She may just be shy, you know, like Chloe. Does Ashley not get the chance to talk to many people either?

Ted finished up his food and stood up. He looked slightly annoyed.

Ted
Well, I suppose you’ll be able to figure that out for yourself in the coming weeks. If you finish your meal quick, I’ll take you to target practice next.

[Deleted]

Rather short part that I wrote a few days ago. Was intending my next post to include another scene, but the Duelyst expansion plus seeing friends has been keeping me occupied. Still, didn't want to sit on this one. Also, is Ayano the only person who has been reading the previous updates? I understand not everyone has the time and the parts can be long, but I can't improve this without proper (or any) feedback. I'll keep repeating the same problems in the story/text/whatever if I don't know what they are. I do thank you guys for liking the parts you've read, though.

Following Lunch, Ted took me to target practice. Smith hadn’t given me or Ted any other orders do carry out after going to the practice range, so I assumed that I was free to go afterwards.

The firing range itself was rather standard. Target dummies were hung from the ceiling by a thin wire. Below them circles of varying sizes had been sketched into the ground, denoting various distances from the dummies.

Lawrence
Isn’t there usually a barrier between the people and the dummies?

Ted
The range is rather crudely and cheaply made, and since we’re using tasers with a fairly short effective range, there’s basically no chance that you’ll be hit from a stray shot. The dummies have been placed quite far apart from each other, and testing various angles is also important.

Ted walked over to a table near the front of the room that had many identical tasers resting on it. He picked one up and handed it to me.

Ted
You use these in the testing range, not your own taser. They function exactly the same, so don’t worry. Let me show you how it works.

Ted used another taser to show me the proper grip, and all the various buttons, triggers, and functions on the device. It was fairly easy for me to grasp, and there wasn’t too much information to take in. I knew that this would come to me with more practice.
The thought that I was wielding a non-lethal taser, and not a gun, definitely helped keep me calm.

Ted
Your grip is rather limp. You’ll have a hard time aiming.

Lawrence
Right… I’ve never used a gun or a taser before.

Ted
Most of us haven’t. These weren’t legal until just recently.

Lawrence
Because of that terrorist attack a few years back? I wasn’t in London at the time.

Ted
That’s right. I was on holiday at the time, but it traumatized some of the staff members- hell, I lost some good friends on that day, too. They were a disorganised, small group from America, but they carried guns and, at the time, the security here wasn’t equipped to deal with their firearms due to the anti-gun laws.

Ted
Their disorganisation led to them being swiftly captured- one poor sod even killed themselves. We lost several good men however, so it was decided that law officials and security officers at Lance would be legally permitted to carry tasers, and we were given bullet proof vests for protection.

Ted
So it’s important that you learn this. Try shooting now.

I took a deep breath, took aim at the dummies torso, and pulled the trigger. Two coils shot out, and I felt the taser sharply recoil in my hand, throwing off my aim slightly. The coils embedded themselves in the left arm of rubber dummy, the rubber mitigating the effect of the shock.

Ted
Alright. Not bad for a first shot. Most people miss completely their first time. Try taking it from different angles and distances. I’m sure that you’ll get better now that you have a feel for it. When you can get it square in the chest or back a couple of times, we’ll call it there. You’ll be in here a lot practicing your shots regardless.

I took it slowly, though Ted encouraged me to up the speed at which I fire in some cases. Ted also took the time to do some practice of his own with a nearby dummy, which gave me time to watch and learn his technique.

We spent two hours in there, and by the end of the session, I was feeling a lot more confident with the taser.

Lawrence
Thanks a lot. I’d definitely like to practice with you again sometime.

Ted
Maybe we can try and sync up our next few practice sessions down here? Sounds like a date!

Lawrence
Haha. I’ll look forward to it. That was all Smith asked us to do. Should we report back to him?

Ted
No, but you should go see him first thing tomorrow morning. He’ll tell you what you’ll be doing tomorrow. Like I said, I’m largely going to be working at the station until Saturday, so you’ll be working with Chloe tomorrow until the end of the week.

Ted
Let’s head back to the station. You sign out there, and it’s also where you’ll return your taser. Speaking of which, when you get in tomorrow, you should put your vest on before seeing Smith. You know where the changing rooms are, right?

Lawrence
I’m sure I’ll find them, you pointed them out to me.

Ted
Right. You have a locker which you keep your vest and whatever else you want in there. First and last thing you do each day is go to your locker to put on or return your vest. Let’s go do that now, then we can sign you out.

[Ayano☆ＵＬＴＲＡ]

I like that there is promise of things being explained and a goal for the future that is more exploration of lance, it's a great hook like I've said before. I think you decriptions of areas and enviroments are brilliant, it honestly feels like I'm reading a novel so you should believe in yourself even more!
Character interaction is enjoyable and it always picks up for me when they talk about lance. The conversation in the cafeteria was particularly good. I enjoyed how ted and lawrence interacted, and the explaining of things didn't come off as exposistion.

Overall, you are doing great! I can't find anything I dislike. It's not a chore to read, I'm interested in the characters and the setting. Keep it up!

[Deleted]

Ted showed me to my locker, which was in a fairly small, uninteresting room filled with other lockers. I figured that a lot of people who worked at Lance also lived here, so they kept their things in their room. We headed back to the train station together. My first day was finally over.

Ted
Well, it’s been a pleasure Lawrence. I’m still on shift, but I’d be happy to buy you a drink sometime.

Lawrence
There’s a pub nearby my apartment, if that’s not too far away from you.

Ted
Nah. I know a good place in London. You’ve only just moved, right? I’ll show you where all the good stuff is.

Lawrence
Um, alright, I’ll look forward to that, then.

Ted
We have a day off Sunday. Here, let’s exchange numbers.

Ted took his phone out of his inside coat pocket. I reached for mine, and began chuckling nervously.

Lawrence
Uh, I don’t actually have mine on me today. I’m not really a phone person, so I forget quite often.

Ted
Wow. I don’t know how you survive. Well, remember it tomorrow and we can exchange numbers then. Oh, perfect timing, your train arrived.

The train pulled into the station. Even though it was getting quite late, it was still packed. Lance truly did operate 24/7.

Lawrence
Thanks a lot for helping me out today, I was quite nervous.

Ted
No problem. Better get on quick!

I nodded, smiled weakly, and entered the train. A minute later, the door closed, and I was headed for home.

Unlike the morning train, there were plenty of free seats for me this time. I sat down, not really paying attention to the people around me. I began staring blankly into space, a wave of tiredness suddenly washing over me.

I hadn’t really done anything today. My day had been shorter than what I will come to expect, and I spent all of it talking to friendly people. Even Smith seemed like a reasonable person. For a place like Lance, I felt strangely relaxed.

The tower I had looked upon for years with so much hatred and dread suddenly just seemed like another building. And it was filled with possibilities for my life to come, when it had felt like Lance had destroyed all opportunities for anyone to live while feeling safe.

I was excited to see Ted again, and to get to know Chloe, Ashley, Smith, and whoever else I may meet. But even with those thoughts in mind, my body felt feeble. Right at this moment, I simply wanted to fall asleep on this train, and never wake up.

I knew that regardless of the opportunities waiting for me, I will always be stuck in this dark, cold world.

I realised I must have dozed off as the train came to a halt. I slowly stood up, the thought of food and a proper bed being the only things motivating me to move. I made a beeline straight for home.

The streets of London were brightly lit compared to the dim lights of the morning. Neon lights of a variety of colours, bright decorations and loud street performers playing music made for the liveliest sight I had witnessed in recent memory. Even Lance’s lights far in the distance seemed to add to the positive atmosphere.

I hadn’t really stepped foot outside at this time of the evening after having come to London. The places open largely seemed to be pubs, cafes, restaurants, and clubs. The options I had here compared to the small town I had come from overwhelmed me.

In spite of my tiredness, I was almost tempted to grab a bite to eat at a nearby food stall, but I remembered that I had a ready-meal at home slowly loosing it’s freshness. I made my way through the crowds back home.

The moment I arrived, I undressed and put my pie in the microwave. I put on the TV, sat on the bed, and the next thing I knew I had completely lost consciousness.

[Stove]

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